Beyonce and JayZ to wed...Does anyone care?

Supposedly JayZ and Beyonce will soon combine forces and take over the world with his huge lips and her even bigger ass. People claims that the 6 year we are/we aren't dating couple filed for a marriage license in Scarsdale Village, NY on April 1st. 

Really, people? Should we even be remotely excited about this union? We all know they have been livin' in sin for the last 6 years. They're too normal for me. Date forever and then realize it could work--so unhollywood. Where's the jumping on couches? Shaking Oprah's weave off to profess your love? Marrying on a whim in Vegas while going comando in ripped jeans? And I don't believe it's a relationship till there is a sex tape involved...I want real romance Hova and B!